#NYR, the 80s, the 90s, going to shows (punk, ska-punk), hanging out with my bf and (genuine) friends, making jewelry, rad nail art, dyeing my hair crazy colours, graffiti (as an observer), cold beer, graphic design, cold brew/iced lattes, #NYM, netflix, horror, autumn, legos, bargain shopping
so out of nowhere (not that i’m complaining), a buzzfeed author wrote an article about gwen stefani yesterday. tl;dr (it really is long): it mentions her relationships, but mostly focused on how successful she is, and about the fight gwen has with her image and how we perceive the act/character of gwen stefani. honestly, i didn’t realize this act gwen even existed. it made me even more angry than usual towards her, lol. it’s just like, who even are you?
* * * * *
now, as a teenager of the 90s, i got THE gwen. the gwen that everyone looked up to, wanted to look like or wanted to bone. for me, when i first saw/heard “just a girl”, i wasn’t like YEAH, OMG GIRL POWER!!!1 – i can’t relate to that feminist spark. i totally agreed with all of it, but i mostly just simply heard something that was right up my alley bc i loved punk/alt rock (i didn’t know what ska or ska-punk was yet), but i also heard synth in it. i also knew right away that her style – i wanted parts of it. right away, NxD really just appealed to me and got the ball rolling for a lot of the genres of music i’d come to grow into.
ayeeeeeeeeeeeeeee, exactly what i’ve been waiting for. a good single to finally emerge from gwen’s heart/head.
i hate to be that cliché no doubt fan and compare, but this isn’t as powerful as “don’t speak”. that’s what the NxD/gwen world was waiting for…
anyways, i don’t know why she chose the word “special” to describe this song, when clearly it’s about splitting with gavin. of course, the tone of the song seems to be her complaining about him not meeting up to her expectations, like it’s all his fault. that annoys me, because she chose to stay with this moron for as long as she did. i’ve said it before, but she’s been complaining about him and writing about red flags since “return of saturn”. why doesn’t she take any responsibility or blame for the situation? i think it’s just a general thing that drives me crazy about some women, i don’t want to gwen-bash. women seem to live in this la la land where love needs to be worked on SO HARD, and then when it doesn’t work out, they blame the guys.
i’m not saying that guys aren’t party of the problem in every bad relationship, but a lot of women put up with bullshit just to keep a dude because: love and soulmates.
FOH… if you see those red flags, you tackle them or move on. people rarely change. life is too short to put up with shitheads and prolong pointless relationships. i steered clear of many a jerk because i wouldn’t put up with any crap. if you mistreat me, you better belieeeeeeeeeeve i’m gone. i wasted years on people that weren’t right for me, that i had “faith” in… at the end of the day, it worked out for me in the long run.
everything happens for a reason, every breakup is a lesson. sometimes people just aren’t meant to be. hopefully you don’t drag it out to the the point of turning into enemies, and both make it out alive, mature, and on speaking terms. there’s no need to point fingers like a baby… there are two people in a relationship. so personally, i just don’t understand how anyone can date someone for more than 2+ years, and just completely cut them out of their lives. you were best friends for years, that makes no sense to me. just work it out.
i now only have ONE ex that won’t talk to me. it’s rough when you have that bad karma lingering for no reason… it’s a good feeling when you come to good terms with exes and friends, whether you remain friends or not. for me, it’s like little gray clouds that hang over my head. no matter how big or small, they’re still there, and it sucks.
sometimes it takes a few months, sometimes it takes 10 years… but at least it happens. 🙂
i keep reading online from other fans that they’re “shocked” and “true love doesn’t exist”, etc. – and i’m just like… really people? have you not been listening to her music about him for the last 15 years? pull your heads out of your asses! she has whined about that man since the year 2000.
every night, i will now say a little prayer that tony kanal will be getting divorced soon as well (jk, but not really, but jk – he’s got kids now…), and they get back together. that way, all will be right in the universe.
PS: only amazing music will come from this. i am beyond ecstatic about that, even though i’m sad for her pain.
hopefully next time, she won’t make the same mistakes that she did with him. less patience, more confidence.
i have always had a love/hate relationship with gwen stefani. most of the time, it’s just like WTF IS WRONG WITH HER, vs. hate. i shouldn’t even say hate (okay okay, the hate is mostly trivial BS things vs. her… hate meaning, eyeroll inducing things such as: the girl can’t dance — i wish she’d stop moving awkwardly, why are is she ever dressing like a chola?, stop being vain and having low self esteem, why are you still with gavin?, why are you not with tony?, what is with those stupid little buns all over your head?), hate is a strong word.
what right do i even have to judge or form an opinion? she’s a celebrity, so i guess fans can’t really help it. i think it’s more just as a fan since the 90’s, collecting all of these albums/songs as stories, and having this person that you make up in your head. the person that i have molded for her is like… she’s awesome, fun, cute, confident, stylish, talented, colourful, and all of that inspires me fully via great vibes. then whilst listening to her songs, everything i adore about her just gets pushed aside because of her ridiculous seemingly self-destructive self-esteem issues?
lauren and i decided to get together on thursday night for shopping and some after work drinks. we also decided to do this right before a huge storm brewing over NYC… this was just moments before shit hit the fan and we ducked into the bowery electric for cover.