January 12th, 2019 @ 11:33 pm
my mother and i were hanging out with my cousin kevin today, and she was shooting off all of the things she became allergic to while she was pregnant with me (4/5 different fun ones). she was also then listing all of the things she ate on a daily basis that was just completely OD…
she had mentioned my aunt would make her ice cream sundaes dripping in chocolate sauce and whipped cream, and that she would go home and eat an entire row of oreo cookies. she also went on to talk about how much pizza she ate.
what i took from this conversation was this:
firstly, i rarely go after desserts, though i don’t hate either she often indulged in.
secondly, in probably one of the most unpopular opinions in the entire world, FROM AN ITALIAN PERSON… i fucking hate shredded mozzarella cheese.
thirdly, i blame these behaviors and hatred of shredded mozz as some type of hereditary mutation because my mother ate like a caffone. again, i’m italian. wtf is wrong with me?
– i was the kid always pulling shredded mozz off of her pizza.
– i don’t want it on top of my lasagna or baked ziti (yes, i realize both things are baked and require it to be on top of it).
– thinking about pulling a handful out of a bag and eating it straight up could make me want to die.
– i don’t want it on my salads.
– keep it out of my chipotle bowls.
– i don’t want it fucking anywhere but in the garbage.
i mean, i really fucking just hate most cheese and i don’t know how people eat it. i especially can’t comprehend how people snack on them and eat them straight up and not on a sandwich or something else.
the cheeses that i DO like are as follows:
fresh mozzarella (yeah… fresh. cold. in a ball, in a slice, whatever, i want it.), ricotta cheese, muenster, american (yeah, yeah, i know, i’m gross), pepperjack, whatever is on tacos… string cheese SOMETIMES. after like two bites, i usually want to puke. i don’t know wtf type of cheese they are.
there you have it, my hatred of cheese.
i guess if you really hate me, now you know how to take me down, lol.