October 5th, 2011 @ 3:30 am

walks, lol’ing with lauren, rangers preseason games, cleaning like crazy, breaking bad, sleepovers/dates with my michael james<3, the golden girls, friday’s, crazy nails, crafting, ricotta cheese, listening to miami horror/taking back sunday and the suicide machines, trying to find work.

september was awesome… october seriously needs to wake the fuck up and be just as awesome, and more.

since i’ve been freelancing for edit and no longer work there full time, i’ve been sleeping in every day until 11am. this is seriously making me a bum. i’m up until 3/4 am most nights, and that isn’t good… on the weekends, mike and i aren’t up that late, so i don’t know why my body is in so out of whack…

work has been super slow lately and it reminds me of why i don’t like freelancing… i haven’t struggled financially in ages, and now i’m budgeting… i feel personally embarrassed, and i end up getting super pissed off at the fact that i could never save a great deal of money over the years. helping my mother really killed me in the long run, but instead of bitching and pointing fingers, i’m just on the job hunt. (in case randolph and i don’t in fact launch our company…)

i interviewed with a spot the other day and it made me realize a lot of things. a lot about how to answer questions (even trick questions – who does that?) on interviews, how to be confident, that i need to sharpen SOME of my skills (but not all of them, mr. “i run a media company, but my website doesn’t even work in IE”… cough.) even if by some miracle i got called back for that job, i wouldn’t have wanted it… but it was a lesson learned and i got something out of it.

tomorrow jes and our friend missy are taking me out for a birthday dinner, but before that i’ll be meeting up with randolph to discuss starting our company already… i’d much rather work for myself and for him than a whole new gig…