but for now i’ll have to wait another week to see your face and all i wanna say, is that i really miss you…
September 29th, 2015 @ 4:51 pm
almost 20 years later, and still one of my favorites… ever. ♥
"i am a weekday on weekends..."
36 years old
STuJessica is in your extended network
Jessica's Latest Blog Entry [Subscribe to this blog]
September 29th, 2015 @ 4:51 pm
almost 20 years later, and still one of my favorites… ever. ♥
September 28th, 2015 @ 9:13 pm
october is one day away… squeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!
hockey, falling leaves, warm lattes, horror movie marathons, long strolls, SWEATER WEATHER, pumpkins, acorns, halloween lights, rides upstate, crunchy leaves, scarves & gloves, winter hats, hockey jerseys, ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh! 🙂
::: it’s the most wonderful tiiiiiiiiiiiiiiime of the yeeeeeeeeeeeeear :::
September 24th, 2015 @ 10:55 am
whoever created this image above is a basic millennial bitch… i will never refer to what i listen to in the genre of electronic music as EDM… ever. to me, “EDM” is a corny 2010’s bullshit term that bro-y club kids came up with. they aren’t the actual rave community, they don’t go to those parties, they have no idea how to even dance to that type of music…. they’re just corny electric zoo poser kids.
when i was a raver, i didn’t listen to EVERYTHING in that lefthand column. i still don’t comprehend how people like jungle or drum & bass (sure, i’ve liked a song here and there, but the majority of it all sounds the same to me) or enjoy dancing to it all night long… it’s so boring. i still listen to a lot of it, though. hardcore was my shit when i was a raver – why is gabber not on that list but tropical house, glitch hop, neuro hop and uplifting trance are? wtf… what even are those? just fuck this entire image, lol.
i don’t know why i’m entertaining this… this is just stupid. fuck whoever made this. you haz outraged me.
September 23rd, 2015 @ 11:34 am
that shithole of a season, summer, is finally gone! in the excitement of it all, i treated myself (and my seester) to a new mikey/halloween scarf! i almost bought the sweater, but then reminded myself that i fucking hate regular sweaters… also: it was $85 – FUCKKK outta here. although $40 is kind of pricey for a scarf, it’s also something i’ll wear A LOT during the winter, and the quality/length is awesome (giggity)… most definitely worth it.
also upon us: HOCKEY SEASON.
i made steve hang these sweet little floating shelves for our small/random hockey shit. i figured it all being near the little sign that i made was pretty appropriate. it’s also the thin space between windows, so it filled it perfectly. our lil living room is getting cuter and cuter by the day (and cluttered – need more bookshelves!).
i’m dying to get the halloween stuff up in the apartment, but i want to wait until october 1st. it’s still hot out there, and doesn’t truly feel like fall just yet anyway.
🙂 this season makes me feel so refreshed and happy. new wonderful things have been aligning at the same time, which is wonderful *thank you, universe!*. >:) old friends keep popping up, creativity has been flowing, strolling around aimlessly for hours in cool autumn weather is upon us, hoodies, road trips, warm lattes, cold beer with warm pretzels, hockey, ahhhhh! i love love love it! i only wish that it lasted as long as our miserable NYC winters do… 🙁
halloween 1978 scarf: [buy it here]
February 9th, 2015 @ 11:26 am
although i find the competition sort of driving/amusing and somewhat inspiring, there comes a point in time where it’s just… draining.
February 2nd, 2015 @ 3:58 pm
i’m sorry, but…
I DO NOT WANT TO SEE PICTURES OF YOU BREASTFEEDING ON MY TIMELINE.
i don’t give a shite if it’s natural… or beautiful… or that you think you have the natural/god given/woman power/feminist right to do so.
– eating is a natural thing, should i post a video of me eating? …or would that natural act bore you?
– hocking up phlegm is a natural thing, do you want me to post a picture of my used tissue?
– having to use a tampon is something hand in hand with a natural process and part of life, should i have the right to remove and post it on my timeline so that you can see it? i mean, it’s even a *YAY* NATURAL, BEAUTIFUL, WOMANHOOD THING!
– would you like to see a picture of me pooping and then my poop? this is also a natural part of life.
i get that maybe breastfeeding isn’t DISGUSTING like some of the examples above, but who the fuck wants to see someone breastfeeding (except complete pervs or women that need some sort of help and are searching online?).
are advocates sitting there “oooohing” and “ahhhhhing” and all gaga over pictures like this when they actually see it? i swear, it’s like some women forget how to act on social media once they’ve had kids… every picture EVER is about their kids, and suddenly their personal interests are gone (and selfies, for the most part, which i’m totally okay with). i feel like there are pictures of breastfeeding exist online, because it’s so damn accessible and easy to put it in peoples faces. my mother has 6 sisters and they all have 1-4 kids, and some of their kids have kids, and i’ve NEVER seen a picture of anyone breastfeeding… ever. we have piles upon piles of family pictures, no breastfeeding pics.
i’m not saying the act itself is disgusting, more power to you if you’re into it. however, i am NOT a breastfeeding advocate. sorry ladies, and if i ever have children… *GASP* I AM NOT BREASTFEEDING. i have zeeeeeeeeeeeero interest in it, nor do i have any interest in fighting for women to have the right to do it wherever they want. i’m sorry, but modesty is a virtue. i’m not saying you can’t do it in public, but please cover it up. i’m not about that “free the nip” life.
i. really. don’t. wanna. see. yo. boobies.
February 1st, 2015 @ 11:48 am
i had taken the day off last friday initially to move, but not all of my friends couldn’t help me that day. since it didn’t pan out, i moved fully (furniture/everything large) on saturday instead, but i still took the day off to get things prepped to move in on friday night. my mom took me back and forth twice with the weird odds/ends that didn’t fit into boxes or bags properly, which was super helpful. at any rate, on friday, the only thing i really had to do besides clean and pack was go to the post office and head over to the new place for the cable installation. once i got home from the cable installation, i was in the mood for some good cleaning/packing tunes, so of course “i wanna dance with somebody” popped into my head.
while i was watching the video, there was a series of thoughts that i had.
a) her hair is huge and awesome.
b) i seriously belonged in the 80’s as a teenager or adult (as per usual).
c) i wanted almost every dress she had on in the video.
d) i asked my male coworker to memorize and recreate all dance moves the males did in the video.
e) i was talking to my screen and telling whitney she shouldn’t be gone already. it’s such an awful thing that she is no longer with us. she was so beautiful and talented, and it made me so sad that it gave me goosebumps.
i remember watching that video as a kid and just loving how much fun she looked like she was having. all of the neon and colours going on is still so inspiring til this day.
that was friday…
i come into work today and i read that her daughter is now in a coma, pretty much on her death bed. 🙁
that is fucking awful. i hope it wasn’t drug related, that would be so fucking sad… and who’s to blame? unfortunately, let’s think back to the 90’s… her substance abusing father had whitney doing all of that shit also. she gave in and did it as well, but still. it wasn’t a part of her life until he entered the picture.
her mother died because of drugs, and her daughter couldn’t handle her death. either depression or drugs could probably be to blame. that is such a horrible snowball effect because of that man.
maybe i’m wrong… but i doubt it, and that is so terrible.
January 22nd, 2015 @ 11:28 am
i often whine about missbehave magazine no longer existing… mainly because it was a MASSIVE inspiration to/for me back in the mid 2000’s. that time in my life was like a 2nd coming of age for me. i found my comfort zone in my adult life, creative life and career. i started working on graphic design and web design again, i met jes, i got really big into graff, i dumped andrew, i loved working on myspace contact tables, i found new music, i got pierced and started getting tattoos, i bought jewelry and clothing i wanted… i basically evolved into the stu i am today… it was just a very creative, colourful, inspiring time… and missbehave happened to be HUGE at that time.
while my ex had subscriptions to mass appeal and juxtapoz, missbehave was thrown into the mix. he would go through them, and then i would steal them and cut them into pieces. i was big into collaging back then. my bedroom walls, canvases, graphic design, etc. – unfortunately, that’s where all of my missbehave mags went… i cut them to pieces to use for art (RIP). i regret doing this now, because i can’t lay around in my bed reading them, and looking at all of the rad/kitschy fonts and graphic design that would inspire me to start doing graphic design and making more t-shirts. i can however (CREEEEEEEEEEP) refer to the waybackmachine to read old posts. one in particular SUUUUUUUUUUUUUPER bummed me out.
clicky click here, then continue reading.
while missbehave is continually missed, even in the year 2014 (just look at how many pins exist), between all the (PACKED) events that took place, and the famous people that they had on their covers, and all of the radness that they brought into peoples lives… that article existed.
despite what i thought they were raking in with the print mag $$$, the deeper i dug into their old website, the crazier it seemed that their posts only averaged 15-30 comments (i’m being generous with the 30).
that is AWFUL. so fucking sad, awful, lazy and what the fuckish. how lazy and weird are we as website visitors/readers (i’m guilty of this as well), that we don’t regularly interact in comments?! even on my websites, it’s a rarity that i get comments – but i still get hits, so people are in fact reading. i’ve had personal websites and blogs since the 90’s, and the only time i had a high number of regular comments was when i had a static webcam to bring in hits (no, i was never nude) or when my little community of fellow cam folks existed.
so there’s a massive group of ladies that REALLY want missbehave to return, but it seems like we didn’t know what we had until it was gone. open your mouths and be online friends, people.
nowadays, my instagram is the same shit. i rarely post selfies, and when i do… 100+ likes. if i post a picture my jewelry or something that is edited nicely and artsy fartsy, i average 20-40 likes.
especially when it comes time to my jewelry, that shit is deflating.
I HAVE OVER 570 FOLLOWERS – MOSTLY PEOPLE THAT I KNOW IN REAL LIFE.
man, people are fucking weird.
December 31st, 2014 @ 4:24 pm
things that happened within the last two weeks…
1. 🙁 korn passed away (RIP)
2. office xmas party!
3. i still have a lot of blue hair?
4. the disney store has RAD mirrors that i want in my adult bedroom.
5. it turned from autumn into dreaded winter.
6. rafael ramos’s funeral took over my neighborhood (RIP)
7. my boyfriend bought gold dipped sneakers. sneakers are weird.
8 & 9. horror pics from ian skelton arrived (#8 for me and #9 for my seester for xmas)!
10. i made a beautiful new ring! you can buy it here.
11. ricardo and i found abandoned coquito in the fridge here at work, so we claimed it.
12. the post is a piece of shit.
13. i FINALLY prevailed and got that SSUR wonder wheel tee that i wanted at a wayyyy lower price than the original.
14. while packing up my apartment, i found this stagebill from when i sang at carnegie hall back in 1995.
October 13th, 2014 @ 3:57 pm
if everyone knew even half the shit that goes on, woof.
…but i shall try.
July 19th, 2014 @ 1:16 pm
i have always been a (neurotic) virgo and always backed up certain things on my computer at all times… apparently, my bookmarks are one of them. i was looking for something in my bookmarks about an hour ago, and i came across a folder that said “From Internet Explorer”. i sifted through the folders, and i think i must have organized a lot of them into my current browser. there aren’t that many still lingering, but one of them was a folder of my friend’s online journals. going through them was very nostalgic, funny and sad all at the same time (they’re journals, duh).
the first one i came across was my exgf caryn’s. i don’t know if we were even really speaking at the time that she had it (2004ish)… i had broken up with her (a million times, 😐 sigh) and dated jeff right afterwards. jeff and i had dated for almost 4 years, and that’s when her journal existed. some things didn’t seem familiar to me, like one of her exgf’s, and when she started hanging out with this one girl meg… i hate that there were times that weren’t good between us, aside from being my ex, she’s been a good friend and in my life for a very long time.
when i was reading through her journal a little bit, i was laughing because there were so many of those surveys that we used to take back in the AOL days. like your full name, fave colour, things about your current bf/gf, future kids names, favorite bands, etc. – those were fun. i remember in the AOL raver reply all list surveys, we used to do them all in different colours and add 1-line ascii art to them… so good.
back when i had my first website, that shit was so beyond invasive. i don’t know who reads this now, but i still get a decent amount of hits (:::blinks:::), but back then, it was dramarama bitches that i hated skimming my posts. i couldn’t always say what i wanted bc it would spark an uproar between friends, or for myself. so corny.
caryn, along with other friends that used to have journals, just wrote WHATEVER. which goes back to the post i had the other day (or was it over a week…? lazy blogger)… i was talking about consistent blogging, and not to totally repeat myself (which i feel that i often do, especially while complaining about being a lazy blogger) but i want to try to keep up with posting. if anything ever happened to me, it’d be amusing for the ones i love to go through this, i’m sure. i used to get lost in ryan’s journal after he died, so i imagine someone would want to go through mine.
i feel like twitter/instagram make me lazy and not post here, tbh.
July 9th, 2014 @ 11:52 am
i have no idea how or why, but there are so many times where i’m listening to a song and i visually see the word/words i’m listening to on ads, signs or store awnings. i always take it as synchronicity, and that i’m in the right place at the right time in my life. i am a true believer in a set path, no matter how nonreligious i’ve been over the last few years, so i love when that happens.
this morning when i was on the M train going to work, i was underground, and the train stopped at 14th st/6th ave and my phone started ringing (i get service at that one stop for some odd reason). my ringtone is set to “nowhere fast” by head automatica, and the ringtone cuts off where daryl is singing just that. after the call i didn’t pick up hung up, cue in the song i was listening to, and it was the academy is… “skeptics and true believers”. when it came back on from the phone call’s interruption, it was at the lyric that says “nowhere fast, nowhere fast, nowhere fast… would you believe me if i said i didn’t need you…”. then i looked up, and a train ad read “get out of there, fast.”
WHAT DOES IT ALL MEAN???!!!
June 12th, 2014 @ 12:35 pm
at one point in our 20’s, sophie and i used to go to holiday cocktail lounge every (or at least every other) friday, so we became regulars there. we got friendly with the bartenders, and sat up at the bar vs. hogging a table for ourselves in the back booth-filled area. one night, we were sitting at the bar and some guy that looked suuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuper familiar to me came bouncing in. i had mentioned to sophie that i thought i knew who he was, but i figured the odds were pretty slim. i was thinking he was famous/well known here in NYC, so i didn’t want to bother him. i figured no one else in the bar knew who he was, because no one else was gravitating towards him aside from the people he showed up with.
at one point, he came up to me and complimented my hair and nails. he grabbed my hand and inspected them. we were joking around and having random convos and i had mentioned that i really wanted to buy a flask. home dude went upstairs (apparently he lived in the building), and returned with a flask for me! 🙂
i didn’t keep it because it was all sorts of fug, but i do love the story. he didn’t stay very long after he brought the flask down for me, and the only other person who knew who he was the bartender, lou. lou only knew who he was because he lived upstairs, and he got to know him via the bar.
aside from being an inspiration via the fashion world, i’ve always loved the fact that he was one of those club kids. i was a teenage raver that hung out over by the cube/astor place, so that always hits home for me.
i started a new category (NYC gems) for things that have fortunately happened to me over the years, just because i was here in this city. i love how weird/small-world NYC is (sometimes), and i seem to have stumbled upon some really cool/weird situations over the years.
man, i love being a native new yorker.
March 14th, 2014 @ 4:29 pm
i went to california last week, firstly for a hockey game with steve in anaheim, and secondly to stay with bee for a week in los angeles. this is the first time i’ve been in LA since 1996, so looking back, i felt like i didn’t fully appreciate it as a teenager (plus, i think i was only really there for half of a day). bee lives in van nuys, which is a ‘burb in los angeles, a wee bit off from the city. still, we got a lot in on this trip – venice beach, shopping down melrose, filming locations, we went to the late late show, etc. — i had a grrrrreeeeaattt time, but i don’t think i could ever live there.
hypocritically, i complain so much about NYC… but there’s nowhere like it, and there’s nowhere i’d rather be. i think it’s just that i’m way bored anywhere that isn’t a tight-knit city like here… maybe i should have seen downtown LA? i don’t drive, which is also something i’d need to do to fully appreciate LA, i guess. i just hate that the city is so large, that sometimes it could take up to an hour to get over to someone in the same city. i realized that i’m sort of MTA spoiled, and i think seeing how “reliable” our transit system is compared to other cities MIGHT make me bitch about it a little less. OKAY, maybe not the buses (MTA, please get your shit together where that is concerned), but the fact that we have trains that run even at least every thirty minutes late at night is pretty impressive. when i really think about it, it shouldn’t be taken for granted.
here’s a quote from an article i found on gothamist that sums it up a little better than my drawn out complaints…
“The city had beat the pants off me. Whatever it required to get ahead, I didn’t have it. I didn’t leave the city in disgust—I left it with the respect plain, unadulterated fear gives. New York is an ugly city, a dirty city. Its climate is a scandal, its politics are used to frighten children, its traffic is madness, its competition is murderous. But there is one thing about it—once you have lived in New York and it has become your home, no place else is good enough. All of everything is concentrated here, population, theater, art, writing, publishing, importing, business, murder, mugging, luxury, poverty. It is all of everything. It goes all right. It is tireless and its air is charged with energy.” (john steinbeck, 1953)
anywhere i travel to leaves me homesick after about 4 days… this apple is always my favorite.
January 27th, 2014 @ 12:25 pm
ohhhhh, the irony of me listening to new found glory to get over this.
i rarely have expectations, but this one was rather misleading…
January 8th, 2014 @ 12:27 pm
it’s inspiring to start at the beginning of the year with a new number, but i don’t believe in, or live by resolutions. i’m the type to just change shit up and commit to it anytime [F5]… i wonder if that’s a virgo trait, or if it’s just me. either way, last year was horribly rough for me, and i’m glad it’s a new year. i’m looking forward to trying to ensure this one is a better this year, and seriously getting my shit together and on track for my 30’s.
i have to learn to focus on important things, rather than shit situations and shit people. so all of those shitty things that happened in 2013 will be out of sight, and out of mind this year.
i’m going to focus on creativity/marketing all that i make/create, networking, making/saving money, learning more wordpress, and getting out of my stupid apartment/neighborhood. i have my few friends that aren’t complete try-hard, flakey, lying, selfish, insecure, narcissistic, manipulative, ungrateful psychopaths that i thoroughly enjoy. hopefully those people and i get to do big things this year (traveling?, shows).
December 31st, 2013 @ 11:01 am
while i was on my way to work this morning, i was walking up 35th ave and thinking to myself as the tourists passed by in clusters, about how fucking cold it is outside. i also thought about all of the people that are going to stand around times square all night for new years eve. my practical brain/bladder/legs are all… NOPE. i would never do that, ever. i’m sure it’s a great experience, it’s just not one that i’d ever do.
PS: the streets and subway look like exodus afterwards, FUCK ALL DAT NOISE.
i have however been IN times square for new years eve, just by means of the MTV building.
my first long term boyfriend, randolph, worked via the help desk for viacom for a few years back in the day. back in the days of jesse camp and TRL (yes we’ve been on it). i used to hang out with him at the office often, which looking back now, seems a little strange. i can’t imagine someone being at my office hanging out right now, lol. i wonder how that was even allowed, but i was good friends with many of his co-workers, and we had a blast there, always.
one year, we did new years eve in the office. i think someone had to be there anyway, so we were like okay, we’ll do it! the office was indeed on the side with the ball, so we got to see it drop up close and personal. i think we had a few of his co-workers with us, i’m a little fuzzy on many details. i have pictures of that night somewhere, i want to try to dig them up.
the only real memorable kicker of the night, was taking the elevator to leave down with winona ryder. i heard her speaking behind me (i LOATHE her voice) and when i turned around, lo and behold, there she was. i remember she was shorter than i was.
oh right, i almost forgot the point of this post… my point was that i feel like not wanting to do new years in times square is another one of those ungrateful new yorker things that we often take for granted. i also think it’s sort of cliche, but also definitely impractical. i mean, what do you do if you’re hungry? or when you have to pee? it’s like a sea of people – you can’t go anywhere… you’re there FOR HOURS (i’m also highly claustrophobic, so maybe that’s why i’m all NO about it?). it just doesn’t seem like a logical thing to do.
NYE, bah humbug.
November 25th, 2013 @ 10:45 am
soooooooooo back in the late 90’s/early 2000’s(?) i used to use this shampoo/conditioner oasis line from vo5. the interwebz says that it’s lavender and chamomile, iiiii just always say “the purple one”, AND IT SMELLED SO DAMN SCRUMPTIOUS. i used to just leave it on my arms to marinate for a few minutes and then rinse it off so i smelled like it, i had always wished there was a body wash to go along with it… it was that good.
of course vo5 discontinued this item for whatever reason, so i thought i could no longer smell my favorite smell again like, ever… UNTIL NOW.
i was browsing CVS for my favorite drugstore body wash the other day, but instead of just grabbing the one that i always use, i sniffed around… i lived a little. i then found this. it smells JUST LIKE the oasis purple jammy, even if the bottle says “tea rose blossom and almond essence”, TRUST ME… it’s the purple vo5 smell!
this seems like a super random/strange post, but i hope it helps some other lady out there someday. there are some smells that are just too good to let go of, lol.
September 25th, 2013 @ 8:35 pm
i have always had a love/hate relationship with gwen stefani. most of the time, it’s just like WTF IS WRONG WITH HER, vs. hate. i shouldn’t even say hate (okay okay, the hate is mostly trivial BS things vs. her… hate meaning, eyeroll inducing things such as: the girl can’t dance — i wish she’d stop moving awkwardly, why are is she ever dressing like a chola?, stop being vain and having low self esteem, why are you still with gavin?, why are you not with tony?, what is with those stupid little buns all over your head?), hate is a strong word.
what right do i even have to judge or form an opinion? she’s a celebrity, so i guess fans can’t really help it. i think it’s more just as a fan since the 90’s, collecting all of these albums/songs as stories, and having this person that you make up in your head. the person that i have molded for her is like… she’s awesome, fun, cute, confident, stylish, talented, colourful, and all of that inspires me fully via great vibes. then whilst listening to her songs, everything i adore about her just gets pushed aside because of her ridiculous seemingly self-destructive self-esteem issues?
August 16th, 2013 @ 10:36 am
so down the block from my new job, there’s a yankee’s store (barf), and i can’t help but roll my eyes and get annoyed looking at the 8 foot tall statue of a-ROID. the other morning, however, i spotted this little gem. if this doesn’t sum up exactly why i can’t stand that team, i don’t know what else could…
i don’t think that this shirts message is even kidding, and i guarantee you every moron that will own that shirt feels/thinks exactly the same way, it’s nauseating. if the rangers (or any other NY team) ever made a shirt like that, i definitely wouldn’t buy it. i’d be like wtf? that’s not even the point of sports!
listen, i understand that the yankee’s have massive NYC history, and baseball in general, but there’s a difference between pride and arrogance. the rangers were one of the original 6 NHL teams, i’m pretty sure that the anaheim ducks don’t and shouldn’t ENVY us for that… if we had 13 stanley cups under our franchise belt, i wouldn’t think they should envy us for that either.
blah blah blah.
either way, this shirt annoyed me. the team is fucking annoying, and the majority of their fans are fucking annoying. this is why even when the mets don’t go into the post-season, i can’t root for these uptown brats.
March 6th, 2013 @ 6:55 pm
in september of 1981, exactly one week after i was born, my (favorite/bff) cousin marie was born. we have been inseparable all of our lives and spent so much time together over the years, even though she lived/lives in upstate new york. when we were little, we both had this really cute piece of art hanging in our rooms (the image on the left). i kept mine, because i’m a total pack rat, but marie’s is probably long gone. i texted a picture of it to her last night and she wants to try to find one for her daughter.
marie had her baby girl two years ago, and i think that she wants sentimental things like that, just as i would if i didn’t actually have this stuff from over the years. we are very attached to our things and especially our childhood together. i have been googling/etsy searching the hell out of this little piece of art, to no avail. however, i did find some other cute stuff on ebay i might snatch up. mainly some coffee mugs. this line of “dear god” kids stuff is all cute kids stuff focusing on innocent/childlike questions to god.
i think i might want to just scan/print and frame the piece that i have, so that she has the exact one. i hope i can find the actual one, though. 🙂
January 25th, 2013 @ 2:22 pm
when people pull that shit, i love to ask them lots of questions to expose their bat-shit crazy ways.
acceptance of others isn’t going to fix anyone’s issues, acknowledgment of and working on underlying issues will.
also related: egos fueled by narcissism and low-self esteem are the worst.
“you’re clear like glass, i can see right through!” – mr. mef
man, people are so weird.
January 23rd, 2013 @ 5:33 pm
if i know you in real life, and for some reason you’re reading this… i hope you realize that i’m dead serious about this post…
this year, i have decided that i have NO PATIENCE for ANYONE’S bullshit. if you irritate me, repetitively force your opinion on me, disrespect me, do some coo-coo bean/retardo high school dramatic bullshit, i’m done. i’ve also additionally hit a point where i really don’t give a shit if you think my idea of “friend-loyalty” is irrational or immature or not, on this next subject…
January 10th, 2013 @ 7:28 pm
i take my astrological characteristics pretty seriously, only because every time i read them – from a million different places – they all describe me TO THE TEE…
over the years, one of my worst/best qualities as a virgo is being critical (i can’t help it). as i criticize and analyze situations, i instantly start thinking about how to repair them or how they could have been prevented. i realize that i don’t have all the answers in life, nor do i believe that my theoretical solutions always the “correct” ones (i’m not a know it all), but most of the time, it’s overlooked common sense shit… and that lack of common sense shit, drives. me. crazy.
it’s hard to not be judgmental when there is stupidity in your face ALL THE TIME – especially on social media. if you’re going to use it as an outlet for your true feelings, and for spitting complaints and issues that are going on in your life, just make your accounts private. that way, you can control who is reading your thoughts, and who isn’t. what sparked this is someone that i follow went on about “mind your business” about a situation at hand.
i find it so annoying when people don’t filter themselves online, and the first thing it makes me think of, is back to the days where if a teenage girl got pregnant, her parents shipped her away… everyone has gotten to the point where no one cares, i mean – there aren’t that many “taboo” things anymore, so no one does that anymore (not that i think that is acceptable behavior, i don’t, but it’s less common nowadays, is my point).
the point of doing that, was so that people wouldn’t be shamed, or embarrassed for their family’s pride, and for that girl’s reputation. nowadays, it’s seemingly “acceptable”, but the minute someone opens their mouth with an opinion, it’s nobody’s business to have formed or voiced an opinion?
the world started getting FUCKED when people stopped caring about what others think, in a way, i suppose. i don’t think that sending your daughter off because she’s knocked up is the answer either… you can’t just sweep shit under the rug to solve problems. i believe that there are levels to these things, it’s not black and white. i guess my point is just to think before you say something that doesn’t belong in the public eye, or get angry when someone forms an opinion. a lot of the time, it’s just human nature.
i tweet a lot of stuff and i may blog a lot on this website about my personal life, but there is A LOT that isn’t on here, either. almost everything that goes on here isn’t all that “deep”, and i don’t expect people to NOT comment on things that i say. feel free to, and i wouldn’t write back screaming that it wasn’t your business to comment in the first place. if it’s in public, it’s up for discussion, and that’s that.
anything that i post here, is general public, filtered babble, that isn’t too detailed. that goes for over the years, also. i have never aired my dirty laundry in detail about ex’s, specific “friends”, etc. for that reason… it’s just not productive, and it’s nobody’s business.
January 4th, 2013 @ 5:24 pm
back in 1992, i hung out with this cool chickadee named suzie. i’ve known her since i was like 8 or 9, and we went to elementary school together for many years. it wasn’t until she graduated a year early and left for intermediate school, that we started hanging out (here in NYC, it’s kindergarten-6th grade and then 7-9 (JHS), unlike most other places that are K-5 and then 6-8 and then high school).
anyways, with her going to a new school, we started hanging out, outside of school. summer vacation, weekends, we’d watch TGIF, play on my babysitters block (where she also lived) and had tons of sleepovers… i remember we used to have a secret club, and we’d go to the beach with her mom, and most importantly… we’d play with our legos.
i don’t remember which was my first set, but i do remember one of my first sets was pool side paradise set. i remember after i discovered that there were sets like that (ones that weren’t all just red/yellow/green bricks), i was *obsessed*. i got a bunch of those, and then i started adding in the POLICE lego sets, because they had high/tall lego pieces and awesome/modern windows.
as i was growing up, my mom was trying to become an interior decorator on the side. she got all of these different design/decorating magazines that i would sit and sift through for HOURS/days/weeks at a time.
it was the early 90’s, and i was obsessed with built-in/lacquer furniture (even though i didn’t have it) and modern style. i was constantly re-arranging my room and putting my furniture together to try to mimic that type of design, since i had to make do with what i had… (view commericals // 01 02). the magazines had floor plans and layouts and i started drawing up my own. i was constantly drawing up dream houses and started building them in lego form. i also got really into frank lloyd wright that year (i still even have a few books on him, and his works).
i don’t know where i went wrong, but i fell off of the architecture-dream-future wagon, i think it was because i was horrible in math and really just wasn’t a book-confident kid. i guess i was just always more of a street-smart kid.
i STILL collect legos and even have some of mine from 20 years ago. mainly smaller sets and minifigures, because my apartment is too small at the moment for displaying cool/large sets. funny enough, lego released frank lloyd wright lego sets (which i do NOT own, yet?). i think it’s super cool seeing your interests come together that way.
in closing, i thank suz and mom for leaving me with interests that still hold strong, 20 years later.
funny enough, i just found suzie on instagram again recently (i forget how), but she still also has lego interest going on. she has a few big pirate ships hanging out on top of a book case, and she also built a light house that even lights up, lol.
January 2nd, 2013 @ 1:59 pm
SO. my favorite bar evarrrrrrrr closed it’s doors last new years, and i wanted to see if there was any update on what’s going on with it.
i vaguely remember that the awning was still up, and that there was filming being done in the bar?
…either way, i needed an update.
i found this article and i feel slightly relieved that the restaurant owner next door bought the space. from reading the article, i feel like it’ll be safe and sound. i hope it doesn’t turn into some yuppie spot, because it was my favorite dive bar in NYC… i can’t wait to see what is on the way.
RIP // holiday<3
November 6th, 2012 @ 2:45 pm
whenever i hear or see the term “ombre” used, a little part of me dies. i realize that it’s a technical term used in hair/cloth dying (suck it), but no one has used it until recently… i get that it is an acceptable term for what it does, but to me it just screams YUPPIE/HIPSTER/FASHIONISTA (barf).
i’m a graphic designer, and being that i’ve been using photoshop for years, i guess that’s why i constantly use the term “gradient”. even when i used to rock that “ombre” hair/tips, i’d call it dip-dye.
i think what pisses me off is that i see it EVERYWHERE. in home decor blogs, nail tutorials, hair tutorials, etc. i’d rather see the word “fading” vs. “ombre”. ombre dresser? i’ve even seen posts that say “ombre/gradient tutorial”… that just sounds stupid, PICK ONE WORD, lol.
“By the way. Where does this word ‘ombre’ come from?? I’ve always called it a gradient. Or is that just my Photoshop/Illustrator learning? I even looked it up on Wikipedia and the results for ombre turned up some card game. Sorry just had to throw that out there because it bugs me every time I see the word on a craft blog. I’m just using it so other people will know what I mean. I guess I’m just making the problem worse. Oh, boy.” – [source]
October 24th, 2012 @ 2:14 pm
so i found this in my inbox this morning, after one of our out-of-state clients came to visit us yesterday (obv. the first time that i had met one of the women i frequently talk to via email and over the phone):
and i laughed at first but then cringed a little bit…